Nissan 5766 – Listening to a Friend Vent

8 Nissan 5766
Listening to a Friend Vent

Lets say a friend is angry at another friend because that girl hurt her really badly and she really needs to talk about it or she needs advice.

Is one supposed to tell her, “No, I’m sorry I can’t listen because its lashon horah”, even though she really needs to speak to someone? I never know what to do in that situation and its so hard to turn away a depressed friend who needs help but then at the same time I am listening to lashon horah. What is the correct procedure?
Thank you,
Chaya (Afikei Torah)


Thank you for your question.

The correct thing to do would be to listen to her, but not accept what she is saying as true. In other words, you can advise her what to do as if what she was saying is true, but not really believe it yourself. Obviously, if there was some way to have her speak to someone who does not know the other person and not mention the name, that would be the best.

Take care,
Rabbi Aaron Tendler